Unsolicited Information Obtained at WallyWorld

I show you this picture to tell you this story.

I went to the only department store within 30 miles of my home. We all know it. You probably have one (or five) in your hometown.

Anyway, I bring my items to be purchased to the front of the store. I look at the self-checkout lanes (my preferred method of purchasing my items) and realize there is only one of these lanes open and the line to use it is long. So I reluctantly head toward one of the manned check out counters and place my things on the belt.

As I am waiting for the cashier to finish with the customer in front of me I overhear (unfortunately) their conversation. Apparently, there was a report on the local news last night about the sale of trailers used after Hurricane Katrina that are being auctioned off in large lots. In the story is was reported that some of the residents of these trailers became ill after living in these trailers. The story went on the say that one of the possible causes of the illness in these indiviuals may have been carpet that released formaldehyde gas into the trailers.

The cashier seemed upset that the government would even think of auctioning these trailers to the general public “because they just want to make other people get sick, you know they do”. Trust me I cannot convey the level of stupidity that was infused into this statement. The gentleman answered her by saying, “well you could probley just open the winders and let them there fumeses out you know”.

He then pushed his cart toward the door. When he was a good 50 feet away the cashier finally remembered to thank the man only to realize that he probably couldn’t hear her anyway.

I did not want to engage this woman in conversation to say the least. But, I had no choice in the matter. As she started to scan my items she picked up the conversation where she left off with the previous customer. As she spoke to me about the news report and the supposed formaldehyde I tried to placate her without engaging her by just mumbling, “really I didn’t see that news report” and look at my bags. She took this as encouragement and went on to say, “nobody would want to live in one of those things if they are gonna be sick from it”. Hoping to speed her up I mumbled, ” yes, I can see how that might give one pause”.

She got a really confused look on her face and said, “uh-huh”. By then my items were totaled up and paid for so I just waited for Laura, our foreign exchange student, to buy her few items.

Later I was telling my husband about the story and complaining about how small the town we live in is and how I can’t wait to live just about anywhere else, he starts to laugh.  I ask him what is so funny and he says,

“You know that lady went home and told her husband, ‘there was this crazy woman in my line today that thinks that your feet will turn into paws if you walk on carpet with formaldehyde in it’ “.

I laughed so hard I thought I was going to wet myself in his car. I mean tears rolling down my face, side splitting, gasping for air laughing.

I love my husband. He always makes me laugh when I need it.

Feet turning into paws. Snicker, Snicker. It gets me even now.


October 14, 2009. Notebook.

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